Although there is some question about the scientific accuracy labeling the third Monday in January as the saddest day of the year, I think no one denies that for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere, January is a tough month. I am no different. Less light, less money in the bank, cold that seeps into my bones, the bloom off the New Year’s rose—it’s always been a hard time of year for me. I still work my steps, literally. I walk every day, (almost), I drink water, drink less alcohol, up magnesium, up protein, watch comedies, take a multivitamin, etc., etc. However, because of some life circumstances, it got bad enough that I reached out for some emergency mental health help. It cost me a $50 co-pay, which is better than a breakdown, but why should people have to pay for therapy period, much less as a “specialty care visit” as my insurance deems it?

Thanks, Humana, for having my back. (sarcasm).

I wonder if we in the U.S. prioritized people’s health and welfare as a public good, rather than profits and tax breaks, would there be as many suicides and shootings?

I hope we get to find out one day.

If you ever feel desperate, reach out to friends and family. I know from experience how suicidal thoughts can take over your life for a while, but also how fleeting they are in the grand scheme when you have support and distractions. You can also call the U.S. National Suicide Hotline: 988  (or google your country’s suicide hotline.)

Please do.

If I hadn’t, this story wouldn’t exist.

Patton Oswalt has spoken to my soul on this subject of depression.

https://youtu.be/aHBVVA8dKlQ

He also had a long conversation about his life-long struggles on the podcast Depresh Mode https://maximumfun.org/episodes/depresh-mode/patton-oswalt-talks-about-it-because-it-happened/

And now, without further ado, Home Chapter 32.